| Not an easy subject right? Before we begin, | | | | talk to you - you need to go and ask an |
| the important thing to remember is that you | | | | adult'. Make sure they know never to approach |
| don't want to terrify your kids about the | | | | the car to engage in conversation.Equally |
| world we live in, or make them feel nervous | | | | this age group may feel obliged if someone |
| on a daily basis. In particular with younger | | | | struggling with their shopping bags or having |
| ones, we all know children are prone to | | | | trouble lifting something into a car asks |
| nightmares when their imaginations are active | | | | them for help. Adults should ask other adults |
| about any kind of predator.This is important | | | | for help - not children! Advise your child |
| for you as a parent also. We ARE very | | | | that if this ever happens to them, not to go |
| fortunate in Australia that the rate of | | | | over and help the person, but to say "I'll |
| non-parental child abductions is low in | | | | just go and find an adult to help you". If |
| comparison to other countries. In our eyes | | | | applicable your child should then go into a |
| though a 'low' rate is still too many, and | | | | shop and speak to the shopkeeper only (again, |
| our aim is that NO children or their families | | | | not just a shopper), to advise them someone |
| will ever have to go through the unthinkable. | | | | is wanting help outside.Common Tactics of |
| Other well reported statistics on the rates | | | | Abductors |
| of child sexual abuse are far too high | | | | |
| though, so some of the tips we'll cover here | | | | We've already mentioned what your child |
| are pertinent to helping your children | | | | should do if an adult approaches them for |
| protect themselves in these situations as | | | | help, but there are many other well known |
| well.Let's start with what NOT to say. | | | | 'tricks' used to lure children away from |
| | | | safety. The obvious one is an adult offering |
| Most of us have been brought up with the | | | | gifts or lollies, or suggesting the child |
| traditional 'stranger danger' message. "Don't | | | | come and look at some cute little kittens or |
| go with a stranger" has been proven to be | | | | puppies. Teach your kids (all ages) that |
| horribly ineffective in keeping kids safe. So | | | | these are common tricks, and if anyone ever |
| first rule of thumb is leave the word | | | | tells them they have something great to show |
| 'stranger' out of your vocabulary when | | | | them, they should ignore the offer and go |
| discussing safety with your kids. Why's | | | | immediately to a trusted adult or to a group |
| this?Research has shown that most children | | | | of other kids to tell them.Another example is |
| when asked who a stranger is, will say | | | | where an adult may say to a child "quickly, |
| 'someone mean or ugly looking'. They simply | | | | come with me, your mummy/daddy has been hurt |
| won't view a nice looking lady or a kind | | | | and they want me to take you to them." Let |
| looking man as someone they should steer | | | | your kids know that if something has ever |
| clear of. When you think about it, we too | | | | happened to you for real, you would only send |
| probably only avoid a 'strange' looking | | | | a family member/teacher etc. to get them. |
| character who tries to talk to us in the | | | | Stress that, even though it might sound very |
| street. In terms of child sexual abuse, the | | | | plausible because the person seems to know |
| majority of children are molested by someone | | | | family names, they should go and find a |
| the family knows, sometimes by an actual | | | | trusted adult who can check it out. Go over |
| family member. So advising children that only | | | | again with your kids that, although they may |
| strangers are capable of harming them will | | | | slightly know the person who is telling them |
| place your children off guard.For older | | | | to come with them, they shouldn't feel bad |
| children (around ten yrs plus) it should be | | | | about saying no, and getting assistance from |
| ok to give the real reasons as to why you are | | | | someone they know well.More Hypothetical |
| concerned about child abductions and the | | | | Scenarios |
| tragic outcomes of some of these. For younger | | | | |
| children though, we see absolutely no need | | | | God forbid your child has found themselves |
| for them to understand that there are people | | | | vulnerable in a dangerous situation, but |
| in the world who take children to sexually | | | | should someone have managed to take your |
| abuse and sometimes murder them. It is far | | | | child, role play what the person may say to |
| better, and more advisable to 'stretch the | | | | them to get them to 'shut up'. Obviously an |
| truth' a little and tell them something like | | | | abductor/molester will want to hush a |
| "there are people out there who don't have | | | | screaming child and may say things like "stop |
| children of their own, so they try and steal | | | | screaming or I'll hurt your mother/father |
| someone else's child". This, in our opinion, | | | | etc". Let your kids know that this will not |
| is far easier for a little child to | | | | happen! and they are to scream, kick, scratch |
| comprehend, and while scary enough in thought | | | | and punch for all their might. Yelling out |
| for them to take heed of what you say, won't | | | | "He/She's not my mum/dad!" or "I don't know |
| create unnecessary terror in their little | | | | this person!" is also advised. If your child |
| heads.Some 65% of non-parental child | | | | has on his/her AmberWatch, then the alarm |
| abductions are committed by someone the child | | | | alert will really help draw attention from |
| or the childs' parents have actually met | | | | passer's by to the situation.Even with sexual |
| before, no matter how briefly. (We say | | | | molestation cases, children are often told by |
| non-parental because the rate of disgruntled | | | | the perpetrator to keep quiet about what has |
| non-custodial parents who kidnap their | | | | happened, or he will 'hurt' someone else in |
| children are much higher than abductions from | | | | the family, or something equally as terrible. |
| other people.) Think of some scenarios where | | | | If your child knows in advance that this is |
| you have had a friendly, albeit brief banter | | | | yet another well known 'trick' to keep them |
| going with someone you don't know. A | | | | quiet, they can focus on protecting |
| tradesperson that has come to your home; | | | | themselves, without the added fear and guilt |
| someone you chatted with in line at the post | | | | that they may be causing more harm to |
| office or in the general neighbourhood; a | | | | others.Be Specific about 'No Go' areas of the |
| salesperson coming to your door. All your | | | | Body. |
| child needs is to witness is you having a | | | | |
| chat or a laugh with someone seemingly | | | | For the average parent, statistics that 1 in |
| 'nice', and the child no longer views them as | | | | 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys will experience some |
| a stranger if they happen to come across them | | | | kind of sexual molestation in their |
| again. If mum is out the front gardening and | | | | childhood, is heartbreaking. Make sure your |
| little Sally sees her chatting to someone | | | | children know that any part of their body |
| walking past with their cute dog, Sally is | | | | that a swimming costume covers is a 'No Go' |
| far more likely to let this person chat to | | | | area for anybody other than a trusted family |
| her if she is out in the front garden without | | | | member. This also includes touching parts of |
| mum a few days later - especially if they | | | | an adults body. Make sure your child knows |
| have that cute little dog with them! | | | | that any sexual advance towards them is |
| Remember, most paedophiles are incredibly | | | | against the law. This will give them the |
| child savvy and personable with children.So | | | | confidence to assert themselves if they know |
| What Do You Say? | | | | it's a legal crime, rather than just |
| | | | something mum or dad don't want.Keep open |
| The best approach is to teach young children | | | | communication with your children and |
| not to talk to ANYONE if you, a teacher, | | | | encourage them to talk to you about anything |
| carer or other parent is not by their side. | | | | without guilt. Remember, paedophiles often |
| This may not sit well with parent's hoping to | | | | use the "our little secret" ruse.On a final |
| instill politeness into their kids, but it's | | | | note, molesters are very good at detecting |
| by far the safest move. If an adult or | | | | attention/affection starved kids. Address any |
| responsible carer is not by their side, there | | | | work/home life balances before it's too late, |
| is no need for cordiality, and most adults | | | | knowing the effort you put into your children |
| today will understand that.If your child is | | | | today will sow the seeds for the next |
| old enough to walk to and from school on | | | | generation of emotionally healthy |
| their own, or travel down to the shops | | | | adults.Jo-Anne Rowland is the director of |
| without you, they need to understand how to | | | | AmberWatch Australia, the Australian |
| react in certain circumstances. For | | | | distributor of the AmberWatch. Recently |
| example:No adult should ask a child for help | | | | featured on CNN's Youth Trend Report and |
| or directions. Kids can be caught off guard | | | | currently taking the child protection world |
| if someone pulls over in a car while they're | | | | by storm, the AmberWatch is being heralded as |
| walking along or riding their bike. If the | | | | a 'first of it's kind' child prevention |
| person yells out for directions, let your | | | | protection product. The beautiful Teri |
| child know it's ok for them to not respond, | | | | Hatcher has just been announced as the |
| or they can simply say 'I'm sorry, I can't | | | | international spokesperson. |